rather sick of

Dredging Up (found email)

I’m not saying you did anything “wrong” but the comment about academic fangs upset me. I’m not sure how that could not be pejorative. However if that’s how I’m coming across I’d rather know so I can tone it down. Though that means cutting a lot of who I authentically am off and shoving it in a suitcase. Which I am rather sick of. I had fun responding to his work, and C’s, and now I will feel less free with my responses because I do not want to hurt anyone’s feelings.

Except yours: F*** OFF!

What I’m Listening To:

“I was an open wound
Looking for a good time
A time that nobody could show me”

— Squirrel Flower / “Open Wound”

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oppositional defiant disorder

Things I Heard Yesterday

It dries up my mouth, it sucks all the moisture out of it.

Do you remember last year’s medication shortage?

Like a fisherman’s black boot …

Celebrate the bullet. If you’re not ska, you’re dead.

It’s a different version of the same cavil.

Did you see Hopper in Apocalypse Now?

What do you have? Oppositional defiant disorder?

Well, bless him, he’s looking out for us.

Due to disagreements a group of men sway public opinion and gain office operating with intimate friends.

Deliquescent means what?

Did you know osmium is the heaviest element?

I don’t know if they did claim it in their tax returns or not.

Woop, woop, wooooeeeeaahh!

Anyone who deals with abused and traumatized kids … sexual abuse speeds up their biological clock and secretes sex hormones.

Juan recommends the latest influencers.

Is that empty?

No study had ever followed mollusks in these conditions.

A bodily fluid spill kit?

We laughed as we watched the dog try in vain.

The rampaging sans-culottes wrecked churches.

Thank you for your order.

Lacking friends in elementary school makes a crucial difference.

Fevers, fevers and pustules!

It’s a complex and rocky time when friends can suddenly turn on one another.

Standby power is wasted electricity.

Allow the actuator to air dry completely.

There’s neither intelligence or support from family and peers.

Good morning, South Florida, I’m …

What I’m Reading:

“I promise you, I was here. I felt things that made death so large it was indistinguishable from air—and I went on destroying inside it like wind in a storm.”

— Ocean Vuong / “Not Even” / Time Is A Mother

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tongue is loosed

Intractable (redux)

You dream
Your tongue is loosed
Upon that intractable wafer
Glued to the roof
Of your perfidious
Mouth

What I’m Reading:

“’The world is an illusion, and living is dreaming,’ I muttered.

Yet blood runs and tears gush forth.”

— Han Kang / Greek Lessons: A Novel

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wink / hidden message

Trying to Decipher The Town of My Birth

Sinvergüenza : Scoundrel
Infundia : Infused
Aborrecido : Abhorred
Ventura : Fortune
Abatido : Despondent
Anhelar : To Yearn For
Sollozaba : Sobbed
Deleite : Delight
Decreto : Decree
Recoveco : Nook
Rechazado : Rejected
Guiño : Wink / Hidden Message
Estan Agotadas Las Entradas : Sold out

What I’m Reading:

“Does it matter that much to know why we are so bad, so heartless and lacking in scruples? I don’t know if it does, I can’t answer my own question.”

— Marcial Gala / The Black Cathedral

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vibrant blue lungs

slip away

we enter a dream

i breathe in water + expel air
thru vibrant blue lungs

your face fractured and crumbling fast
dark spots burst in my vision
my eyes burn

you sing in rhyming couplets
from the bottom of a dark well
incinerating the cricket chir
into a call of lustful evangel

a tabernacle of infinite alienation
before i slip away

What I’m Reading:

“Time is a mother.

Lest we forget, a morgue is also a community center.”

— Ocean Vuong / “Not Even” / Time Is A Mother

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the haunted sounds

frozen albatross (redux)

keep away ghost
of a thousand eyes
go back to hell
where you belong
i’ve seen your lips
move out of sequence
with the haunted
sounds you dredge up
why are you dragging
a boat about
your neck
the river
what’s left of it
tells me it’s too late

What I’m Reading:

“Black milk of daybreak we drink it at dusk
we drink it at noon in mornings we drink it at night
we drink and we drink
we dig a grave in the sky there is plenty of room”

— Paul Celan / “Todesfuge”

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hottest year ever

The Best Stuff I Read This Week

“I’m back inside
my head
where it’s safe”

— Ocean Vuong / “Dear Peter” / Time Is A Mother


“It’s always like that. Childhood makes us what we are.”

— Marcial Gala / The Black Cathedral


“The US was no longer number one. The ‘recyclable’ waste of other nations was shipped here instead. Migrants no longer rushed its borders. Countries had begun programs of de-Americanizing, severing ties with US companies and businesses, and levying fines and taxes in trade. Its most significant cultural artifacts, including the Constitution, the Declaration, were on loan to foreign museums, displayed in clumsily curated exhibitions that lumped them with British curios … how to raise a child in this time and place.”

— Ling Ma / “Tomorrow” / Bliss Montage


“I woke up and said
‘I have slept until now,’ and now
I have stopped sleeping altogether.”

— Laurence Wieder / “These Anemones, Their Song Is Made Up As They Float Along”


“Emissions from the motor sector could have fallen by more than 30% between 2010 and 2022 if vehicles had stayed the same size, a report has found.

Instead, the size of the average car ballooned as the trend for SUVs took off, meaning the global annual rate of energy intensity reductions – the fall in fuel used – of light-duty vehicles (LDV) averaged 4.2% between 2020 and 2022.”

— Helena Horton / “Motor emissions could have fallen by over 30% without SUV trend, report says” / The Guardian


“‘Bad to the Bone’ plays overhead and embarrasses
me. This is the worst first date ever, worse than the
sad man with the trashed Firebird in his backyard.”

— Julia Story / “‘Bad to the Bone’ plays overhead and embarrasses…”


“Earth’s vital signs are failing … Record emissions, ferocious fires, deadly droughts and the hottest year ever.”

— Antonio Guterres, UN Secretary General / COP28 introductory remarks

What I’m Listening To:

“Police dem
Shoot you so young
Police dem
Shoot you so old
Police dem
Hard steel so cold
Police dem
Put in choke hold”

— Idris Ackamoor & The Pyramid / “Police Dem”

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in this (my) neighborhood pt.52

What I’m Reading:

“Hope. It’s powerful; it can change things. But you’ve got to put yourself in the way of it, let yourself feel it. Let the power of it lift you up. That’s what you’re doing: putting yourself in the way of hope. Do that and anything can happen. Start from here!”

— Raynor Winn / Landlines

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on the wall

image: p. remer

(ham on the wall)

ham on the wall

love on the rocks

blood on the tracks

ain’t comin’ back (home)

image: p. remer

What I’m Reading:

“She just didn’t like taking up space.
Everyone occupies a certain amount of physical space according to their body mass, but voice travels far beyond that. She had no wish to disseminate her self.”


— Han Kang / Greek Lessons: A Novel

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doglegs and dollops

Gala

Doglegs and dollops—perverse agitations that might be able to help. I am alone here caring for both.

My motorway—untraveled by deadbeat descendants.

Emergency in stairway 4! Toffee stuck on my canines and it’s too much for me to manage.

Does anyone have a lead on caribou to traverse my motorway? A few housemartins perhaps? Maybe a laxative deputation on horseback?

I’m not sure we need more greatest hits medleys in a society rife with pestilence—perhaps a one hit wonder?

Hence, my motto: Just a bit of melodrama and we’re on the move closer to the asylum.

See you at the gala.

What I’m Reading:

“childhood
is only a cage
that widens
like this sunlight honest
through the clinic window”

— Ocean Vuong / “Dear Peter” / Time Is A Mother

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