“Dear Neighbors,

I have a relative who is chronically ill. Long-term antibiotic use has left him with severe indigestion, brain fog, and fatigue.

As you may know, we have friendly gut microbes (called the “microbiome”) that help our metabolism, immune system, brain function, etc. Extensive antibiotic use can deplete and imbalance the microbiome, disrupting its key functions.

The cure is to transplant a healthy microbiome from a suitable donor, age 3 to 30, via their STOOL – this is called fecal microbiota transplant (FMT).

STOOL quality can be assessed by its appearance and a few questions about the donor.

As a reference, here’s the Bristol STOOL chart from Wikipedia: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/9e/BristolStoolChart.png

The ideal is type 3: uniform and consistent, firm, dark brown, shaped like a “cracked sausage”, little to nothing undigested, relatively small.

We’d be happy to compensate for quality donations. If you or someone you know would kindly consider helping, please contact me…”

(The above is another fecal email, received over the electronic transom, from one of the good folks who reside in my building.

A found piece of Dada goodness!

I’m sorry. I was last was Type 1…

We wish them the best of luck and improved health!)

This is Fall, at 7:28 a.m., on 10/28/2020. Jamaica Plain, MA. (28/31)

“Marry somebody you love and who thinks you being a writer’s a good idea.”

— Richard Ford